Serendeputy - your personal news assistant.

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Serendeputy is your personal news assistant.

Your deputy:
- learns what you like and don't like,
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What to do:
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  2. Click smileys and frownies
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Fox News’s insufferable little prick Jesse Watters got himself into a brief fuck-tussle with Huffpo reporter Ryan Grim Saturday night at the MSNBC afterparty following the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Watters, best known now as Bill O’Reilly’s...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Monday, May 2, 2016
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At a campaign stop in Evansville, Indiana, Ted Cruz happened upon a Scott, a disabled man, and his family. It did not go well.
From: Wonkette | By: Robyn Pennacchia | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Y’all listen up, for we actually have a #NiceTime involving gaywad-sexuals what live in Mississippi! We mentioned when we reported on the state’s horrific, most-insane-in-the-nation “religious freedom” bill, that a mean federal judge had just...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Rick Scott hopes a recent minimum wage hike in California will cause businesses to move to Florida, where they can pay workers less.
From: Wonkette | By: Robyn Pennacchia | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Did you hear about the breaking news about how on top of how Ted Cruz is maybe the Zodiac Killer, his dry-drunk dad might have been Lee Harvey Oswald’s fluffer when he murdered our beloved President John Fitzgerald Kennedy? It’s in The National...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Let’s get one thing out of the way: Kirk Cameron is cute. This is why it such a screaming shame he fell in with the wrong crowd and became a creationist dickweasel fundamentalist Christian. And he dragged his dumb sister into temptation with him, and...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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A nice-time update, at least insofar as anything involving opioid overdoses can be considered “nice”: On Friday, the Maine Legislature voted overwhelmingly to override Gov. Paul LePage’s veto of a bill to allow pharmacists to dispense the anti-overdose...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Inside the secret illuminati plot to depopulate the world and deprive Roosh V of a wife that will make him all the sandwiches.
From: Wonkette | By: Robyn Pennacchia | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Ugh, Starbucks, really? You’re going to try to tackle actual serious societal problems again, now in Ferguson, Missouri, no less? Okay, fine, how are you falling on your face this time? Wait … Starbucks’ plan is actually well-thought-out and appears...
From: Wonkette | By: C.A. Pinkham | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Nevada Assemblywoman, congressional candidate, and all around gunstrumpet Michele Fiore has been thinking long and hard about what freedom means, and what freedom means to her is apparently the inalienable right to get yourself blown away by cops if...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Heidi Cruz would like to tell all you people that Ted Cruz is not the Zodiac Killer. Then again, that’s exactly what you’d expect the wife of the Zodiac Killer to say, now isn’t it? It’s not like she’s going to come out and admit it. In a Yahoo...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Oh look, Fox News is being racially transcendent again! We predicted after the White House Correspondents Dinner, AKA Nerd Prom, that the race experts at Fox News and other shining lights of the wingnut-igentsia would treat us to weeks upon weeks of...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Tuesday, May 3, 2016
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Sad news about the global warming hoax, you guys. Turns out that the liberal scientists are so committed to their big lie that they’re going to go down to Antarctica and melt all the ice, which will cause the sea level to go WAY up, and when they are...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Watch out, lady shoppers! There may be men dressing up as women and coming into the ladies’ biffy at your local Target, and if there are, chances are they’re crusading morons from the American Family Association out to prove that a well-concealed...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Monday, May 2, 2016
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You may remember former Virginia governor Jim Gilmore, who was, at least on paper, an actual Republican candidate for president longer than Carly Fiorina, Chris Christie, Rick Santorum, Rand Paul, Mike Huckabee, George Pataki (who?), Lindsay Graham,...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Meet Donald Trump, Social Justice Warrior
From: Wonkette | By: Robyn Pennacchia | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Barack Obama did Barack Obama’s very favorite thing Saturday night, and that is “making fun of Donald Trump.” Did Donald Trump get so frowny madface that he immediately started running for president afterward? Nah, not this time. But he did have...
From: Wonkette | By: Rebecca Schoenkopf | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Hey look, it’s another person who hates Ted Cruz and his creepy, punchable face. Apparently there was a youngun’ in attendance at a Cruz rally in LaPorte, Indiana, and he decided to shout his feelings at the bad Canadian man, which were “You suck!”...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Monday, May 2, 2016
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At a campaign rally in Fort Wayne, Indiana, on Sunday, Donald Trump forcefully described China’s trade relationship with the USA as an act of sexual violence: “Don’t forget. We’re like the piggybank that’s being robbed. We have the cards. We...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Hello! And welcome to what we hope shall be a new weekly feature here at yr Wonkette!
From: Wonkette | By: Robyn Pennacchia | Monday, May 2, 2016
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DRUDGE SIRENS AND ALL THE OTHER THINGS THAT MAKE YOU SAY “WHOA!” Matt Drudge found some kids cussing: Sounds like front page news aggregator website material! And if we go to the video, we do find children of the Hispanic persuasion making sailors...
From: Wonkette | By: Evan Hurst | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Donald Trump and Geraldo Rivera have a complicated relationship. They theoretically have undying love for one another (but not in a gay way, because no homo bro) yet is that love really possible when they each adore themselves so very much?  And what...
From: Wonkette | By: snipy | Monday, May 2, 2016
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You know what we love to do on the weekends here at yr Wonkette? We like to kick back and read some longreads. Who doesn’t love to dig into a nice meaty story while drinking a cup of coffee or nursing a hangover or regretting who you brought home...
From: Wonkette | By: snipy | Monday, May 2, 2016
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Funny how the Deleted Comments biz goes. A couple weeks back, we had so few real winners that we had to forego the feature altogether; this week, we’ll have to select carefully from a veritable smorgasbord of Derp. So let’s get right to it, with...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Sunday, May 1, 2016
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Sun Salutations, dear readers, and welcome to the Snake Oil Bulletin! This week we have breaking news about the trial of Collet and David Stephans, the Albertan naturopathic couple whose son Ezekiel died of meningitis. We give fair warning to all readers...
From: Wonkette | By: Fare la Volpe | Sunday, May 1, 2016
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A Corporate Person with a legacy of overthrowing native governments to make it easier for their nice time plantations is still misbehavin’? Say it ain’t so! Dole Food Company allegedly knew its salad tested positive for deliciousness listeria about...
From: Wonkette | By: Matt Carpenter | Sunday, May 1, 2016
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Just in case you missed it, here’s Your President Barack Barry Hussein Bamz Obama in his eighth and final appearance at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, and after doing this seven previous times, he has this stuff down. It’s really pretty...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Sunday, May 1, 2016
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It’s time for that annual ritual where Official Washington attempts to be funny (and sometimes they make it work!), the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, AKA the Nerd Prom, AKA “Comedy Hit Or Miss Night.” You might remember that one time when...
From: Wonkette | By: Doktor Zoom | Sunday, May 1, 2016
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How does Donald Trump even keep track of all these KKK endorsements?
From: Wonkette | By: Robyn Pennacchia | Saturday, April 30, 2016
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